Thursday reflections on the December exhaustion that starts in November, Mercury’s timing, and why this year might need to be different.

December starts in 17 days.

You might already feel it. I know I do. You might have a subtle tightening in your chest when you open your calendar and see it already filling up with obligations. Or not. Then there’s the mental inventory that starts running at 2 AM that goes… gifts to buy, parties to attend, meals to coordinate, family dynamics to work out….

It hasn’t even started, and you might already be exhausted.

If that’s you, and if November is already coloured by December anxiety (or choose your own word), you’re not alone. And you’re definitely not overreacting.

The retrograde review you didn’t ask for

Mercury’s been retrograde since November 9th now. It’s been moving through your beliefs and certainties, asking you to reconsider what you thought was settled. And one of the things it’s insisting you review is next month’s calendar.

That means you’re looking at December with retrograde eyes, so you’re seeing it more clearly than usual. The real version. The one where you lose yourself somewhere between the first obligation and New Year’s Eve.

The retrograde is actually making you reconsider whether you want to do December the way you’ve always done it and whether that performance is sustainable. Does saying yes to everything actually serve anyone, including you? It’s trying to get your attention before you sign up for another month of abandoning yourself.

The weight that arrives early

Maybe you’ve already gotten the family group text, the one about Christmas plans that somehow makes your nervous system spike before you’ve even read the details. You know, where holiday coordination feels less like planning and more like negotiating a hostage situation. (I’m only slightly exaggerating here…)

Or maybe you’re scrolling social media and seeing the first wave of decorating posts, baking content, and gift guides, and instead of inspiration, you feel pressure like there’s an invisible scorecard updating itself: gifts to buy, things to make, standards to meet, magic to manufacture…

December hasn’t arrived yet, but the weight of it already has because your body remembers every December where you performed joy you didn’t feel. You managed everyone else’s emotions and said yes when you meant no. Where you bought gifts you couldn’t afford to prove something about your worth, and you walked into family gatherings as a functioning adult and somehow became fourteen again within minutes.

Your body keeps score. And right now, it might be bracing.

What clients keep telling me

Every November, I hear the same thing in different variations:

“I’m already dreading Christmas and it’s not even December yet.”

“I know I’m going to say yes to things I don’t want to do, and I’m already resenting myself for it.”

“Why do I feel like December is something that happens TO me instead of something I participate in?”

“I feel lonely at Christmas, even with all the people around.”

“I just want to skip straight to January.”

These aren’t throwaway comments as much as pattern recognition. They’re women (and a few men) who’ve done enough inner work to see their cycle clearly but haven’t figured out how to change it while it’s actually happening.

There’s this thing about December. Most support helps you understand what happened after it’s over, and you’ve already lost yourself at the social gathering. After you’ve already overextended and already said yes to everything and collapsed in exhaustion.

But what if you had support that could change what happens while you still can?  (Great question, right?)

I’m doing this differently this year

I’ve been sitting with what December actually needs. I don’t mean what the culture says it needs. You know – more magic, more giving, more festive energy. The works. I mean what humans trying to survive it, actually need.

And what keeps coming up is real-time support. The kind where you can text from the bathroom at your sister’s house. Where you can email before you respond to that triggering family message, or get help crafting the boundary before you cave to the obligation.

It’s the kind of support that doesn’t just help you process what happened, it helps you change what happens next.

So I’m opening something I haven’t done before. I’m calling it Get Through December Without Losing Yourself: UNLIMITED. A 5-week psychospiritual companion from December 1st through January 4th. (Yes, it’s a long title; yes, it doesn’t even say it all.)

It’s not about making December magical as much as making it conscious. Staying connected to yourself when everything is asking you to perform. Having someone who can help you see the soul pattern AND craft the actual response in real-time.

With that in mind, I designed it around the five natural movements of December:

• Week 1: The anticipation hangover (before it even starts, you’re exhausted)
• Week 2: The performance review (when “festive” becomes another job)
• Week 3: The gifting complex (what you’re really exchanging when you exchange presents)
• Week 4: The main event (family gatherings and the annual regression Olympics)
• Week 5: The edge (who are you when the performance ends?)

Each week, I’ll send you a frame for what’s probably moving. But the real work happens between us in the texts from parking lots, the emails about difficult conversations, and the real-time processing that changes outcomes instead of just explaining them later.

If this is landing

You might be reading this and feeling that particular relief that comes when someone finally calls out what you’ve been experiencing but couldn’t quite articulate.

If that’s happening, and you’re recognizing yourself in this pre-December dread, your system is probably trying to tell you that this year needs to be different. And that you can’t perform your way through another December and expect to come out intact.

Mercury goes direct on November 29th. December starts two days later. The reconsideration period ends right before you need to use what you’ve reconsidered.

So, what if instead of white-knuckling through December alone in your head, this year you had someone who could help you stay adult when the family system wants you to regress? Who could help you hold boundaries that actually hold? And help you decode why that barista in ‘bucks just triggered your father wound?

What if you could change December while it’s happening, not just recover from it afterward?

I’ll share more details about how this actually works in the coming days. But if your body just said “yes” to any of this, your soul knows what December is going to ask of you. And it’s asking for backup before the month even starts.

I have deep respect for all those who are tired of performing December,

Jonni