Some people talk in their sleep. Some grind their teeth or snore. I clench my fists like I’m preparing for a fight I’m not even aware of.
Which means I now have trigger finger in both hands. And yes, my middle fingers. So, I’m typing this newsletter wearing finger buddies on both hands. It’s humorous and painful. Mostly painful. But also a little funny.
And it got me thinking. (As everything does)
What are you gripping?
My body’s been doing something while I sleep that my mind doesn’t know about. Night after night, my fists are clenched, as though they’re bracing to fight. They’re holding on so tightly that my fingers are locking up.
I didn’t know I was doing it. I wasn’t aware of the tension until it became impossible to ignore when my hands stopped opening the way they should.
And I wonder how many of us are carrying some kind of tension we don’t know we’re holding. Maybe a brace against something that may or may not be coming. Or a grip so tight we’ve forgotten we’re even gripping.
The energy this week
This week has an edge to it. There’s friction in the air. It’s the kind that brings old power dynamics to the surface. I’m talking about things you’ve been tolerating that might suddenly become intolerable. Things you’ve been avoiding might show up and demand your attention. That means that all the stuff running on “I can’t deal with this right now” is ready to be dealt with.
It’s not comfortable, but it’s clarifying.
Think of it as a deep spring cleaning of your patterns, excuses, and stories you’ve been telling yourself about why things have to stay the way they are. This week makes those visible for what they are.
And by the weekend, there’s a rare Blue Moon, which is the second Full Moon of the month. This one is expansive, truth-seeking, and ready to release. It’s asking us what beliefs we’ve outgrown, what are we ready to let go of, and what horizon is calling us forward.
The belief that won’t survive this week
“I have to keep holding on.”
Nope. You don’t. And holding on this tightly is its own kind of damage.
I know the grip can feel like safety, like if you let go, something (fill in the blank) might happen. But look at what the gripping is costing you. Look at what locks up when you won’t release.
This week, the bravest thing you can do is open your hands, because you can’t live clenched forever. (Note to self)
What to expect
A week of clearing the old tensions that are surfacing, the old patterns that are becoming visible, and the things you’ve been bracing against, finally arriving or showing themselves as paper tigers.
There’ll be space to breathe later. The Blue Moon will bring perspective, expansion, and a sense that something has shifted, even if you’re standing in the same room.
And what I always say is that when your perspective changes, you stop reacting from where you’ve been and start recognizing what’s actually calling you forward.
Why this matters
I’m typing this with finger buddies on both hands. It’s going about as well as you’d imagine. It’s absurd. And it’s also a message I apparently needed to receive. That you can’t keep clenching and expect your hands to work.
So this week, I’m practicing opening. I haven’t yet figured out what I was bracing for, but I’d like to use my hands for something other than fists.
Maybe you’re carrying something similar. A tension you didn’t know you were holding? A grip you forgot you were gripping? A brace against something that may never come or that already did?
This week, see if you can notice it. And maybe, just maybe, let it go.
Open your hands and see what happens.
Jonni
P.S. If you’re in the middle of unclenching some old patterns, beliefs, and old ways of bracing, UNLIMITED is my favourite container. If you could use a steady, soulful set of eyes, I offer 7, 30, or 90 days of real-time support.
P.P.S. The middle fingers. I mean, really. My unconscious has a sense of humour.
